Help! Caregiver decision fatigue is depleting me.
- Juli Henderson
- Jun 9
- 3 min read
I’m going to give you one practical idea that has helped me.
When I am overwhelmed, I need structure in my life. Being a mother requires structure but, sometimes, I was just exhausted, and there was not enough space on my desktop computer to hold one more email from the school. So, I used multiple binders and folders to keep our family’s life organized. As our five children grew up in our home, it wasn’t always neat and tidy, and the laundry seemed to never get completely organized no matter what I did!
Similarly, when it came to Robert’s medical paperwork and keeping that organized, I really needed help. I couldn’t get my head around how to organize the multiple binders of information, much less have time to do the required late night caregiver tasks unless it was very late at night after we had put him to bed.
However, my sister, Vivienne, knows how to organize an office with multi-colored binders, perfectly generated labels, and creative storage solutions. I needed so much help, and she came to my house and did that organization task with me. It was a gift to have her think through the different ways to keep Robert’s life organized for us.
Suggestion: Think of a person you know who loves office spaces and enjoys organizing with beautiful space strategies. You know the one: the friend who lives for creating the “save-give-trash” bags! Maybe they would be willing to help you organize your loved ones’ medical binders. I didn’t need additional space to hold Robert’s life, I just needed the space I had to be organized so I could get to the information I needed for the never-ending phone calls and appointments that concerned his life.
Staying organized as a caregiver is a demanding, daily requirement. You don’t have to get organized by yourself, though. Consider one of these suggestions:
Ask a friend or family member to help with an organization task for a certain number of hours.
“Body double” an organizational day with another caregiver on FaceTime.
Ask a volunteer from church to sit with your loved one for two hours while you file paperwork.
I hope these tried-and-true ideas will help you be brave. You can ask for help, get organized and release some of the daily micro-decisions weighing on you.
You can do this!
Listening Library: “Fix You” (Coldplay)
Fix You
When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try, you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face, and I
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face, and I
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Songwriters: Christopher Anthony John Martin, Guy Rupert Berryman,
William Champion, Jonathan Mark Buckland
Fix You lyrics © Universal Music Publishing MGB Ltd.
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